Tuesday 12 October 2010

Discipline with Humour and Song

If you're like me, you really don't enjoy nagging at your kids for the same old things day in and day out. I've tried many different ways to "be heard" above the natural parental tune-out children seem to gain at an early age. One trick that seems to work, not only to get a point across, but also to lift everyone's mood is using humour, and the most effective mode of delivery is through music.

Ok, well, perhaps calling it music is stretching things a bit. I have not been blessed by either a beautiful voice or a musical ear, so my efforts are less than tuneful even when I'm trying for "serious". But that's the beauty of this: out of tune is even better! What I do is choose a random song, then invent appropriate lyrics to that tune to fit the situation. My kids often roll their eyes, but they have also been known to take over when they've had enough of my own inventions. When still in their preschool years, they invented the "leaving" song:

"Get your coats and boots on,
and get into the car
Get your coats and boots on,
and get into the car

We are late
so don't delay
and put your coat on

We are late
so don't delay
and put your boots on

Put your coats and boots on
and get into the car!"

Bad rhymes, words that don't fit the song rhythm--that's all a part of the fun. And even with all their moaning and complaints, it nearly always brings smiles and diffuses what ever situation is brewing, at least somewhat, when mom belts out a "tune".

Lately, I've found that singing "You Light up My Life" by Linda Ronstadt is very effective, especially when the kids get pouty or jealous. Who can stand that one off key and still stay pouty?! And I don't even have to change the words!

I do wonder though, if that might be pushing things a little too far. Can singing be considered a form of child abuse? It does lighten things up a bit, but will there be long-term psychological scarring? Or will it become a cherished memory, of the times, however few, when I lightened things up and shared with them the gift of humour?